Please note I have checked all the websites but as you know they can change.
In this website there are links to other websites and blogs owned by third parties. These links appear as resources and only as a resource for your convenience and not as an endorsement. I am not responsible for the content of these sites and make no representations regarding the content or accuracy of materials on these sites.
This page contains information which will reinforce the books with more of an explanation. Included are poems, activities, definitions, quotes, websites, more information, books that may supplement the children’s book on its theme, etc. My goal is to give the adult: parent, teacher, librarian, teenager, and babysitter more information to help guide/mentor your child positively and to add/supplement your discussions about the books.
These books can be read aloud with an adult: parent, grandparent, teacher, librarian, babysitter, or childcare worker and/or read by a child by him or herself. A different page can be read in one day or the entire book all at once. One can read these books without including the charts and later on go back to the charts for clarification. Families and adults, as suggested by someone who read these books commented on, could also benefit from these books. There are activities on the theme that are also shared.
Included are poems, activities, definitions, quotes, websites, more information, books that may supplement the children’s book on its theme, etc. My goal is to give the adult: parent, teacher, librarian, teenager, and babysitter more information to help guide/mentor your child positively and to add/supplement your discussions about the books.
Much of the information below I have changed the words “kids” to “children” or “youngsters” as that is how I want to talk about children.
I have put the corresponding websites after the information.
For “‘How Can You ‘Love Yourself?’ Finding Many Pebbles to Make a Difference in Learning about ‘Loving Yourself’”
Inclusivity
The word “neurotypical” describes someone who thinks and processes information in ways that are typical within their culture. They tend to learn skills and reach developmental milestones around the same time as their peers.
In contrast, the term “neurodivergent” describes someone who processes information in a different way. Autistic people and those with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and similar conditions sometimes identify as neurodivergent.
These words can be a way of moving discussions away from focusing on a disease or mental health disorder, implying instead that people simply have a different way of understanding and interacting with the world.
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/what-does-neurotypical-mean
I wanted to write a book that was inclusive using Mrs. Hope, Ruth and Evan and some of their friends or people they meet through their journey as the characters.
Inclusivity is the fact or policy of not excluding members or participants on the grounds of gender, race, class, sexuality, disability, etc.
“Inclusive literature is necessary to help children feel represented in the books they are reading. It can also be a window for readers to experience characters, cultures, and circumstances that are different from their own.”
“What is the importance of inclusive stories? When children are provided with stories that both reflect their backgrounds as well as the backgrounds of others, they become better-rounded and gain a greater understanding of their own identity as well as the identities of others.” The Benefits of Using Inclusive Literature in Kindergarten through Fifth Grade Classrooms, Guidelines for Selecting Inclusive Texts, Guidelines for Selecting Inclusive Texts, and Resources to Help Teachers, Librarians, and Community Members use Inclusive Children’s Books.
https://scholarworks.bgsu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1944&context=honorsprojects
https://www.readstoleads.com/blog-article/how-to-write-inclusive-content
Quotes/Music:
More quotes can be found in the children’s book, How Can You ‘Love Yourself?
“In diversity there is beauty and there is strength.” By Maya Angelou
“We all live with the objective of being happy: our lives are all different and yet the same.” By Anne Frank
“United we stand, divided we fall.” By Aesop (620 -560 B.C.)
“The richer we have become materially, the poorer we become morally and spiritually. We have not learned the simple art of living together as brothers.” By Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
“Love yourself first, and everything else falls in line.” By Lucille Ball
“Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?” By Thoreau
“The question is not what you look at but what you see.” By Thoreau
“If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.” By Thoreau
“This world is but a canvas to our imagination.” By Thoreau
“Don’t change for anyone. People will love you for who you are or you don’t need them for in your life.” Anonymous
“Take Pickles,” said Papa Pete. “There are big ones and little ones, smooth ones and bumpy ones, very crunchy ones and not-so-crunchy ones. There are bread and butter pickles, gherkins, hamburger slices, half-dills, full-dills. The point is this. They’re all different and they’re all delicious to someone and you, my grandson are positively delicious.” “Hank Zipper” By Winkler, page 132
“We’re all good at something, you’ll have your chance to shine. Everybody’s a star, a brilliant creation, the trouble is finding the right constellation!” “The Blue Ribbon Day” By Couric
“Whether we’re a preschooler or a young teen, a graduating college senior or a retired person, we human beings all want to know they we’re acceptable, that our being alive somehow makes a difference in the lives of others.” By Fred Rogers
“Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievements.” By Golda Meir
“Know thyself.” By Socrates
“To thine owns self be true.” (from Act 1 Scene 3 of “Hamlet”) By Shakespeare
“To love others you must first love yourself.” By Leo Buscaglia
“What if you took that dark storm that you’re going through and instead of letting it destroy you, you choose to use the water from the dark clouds to help you grow?” By Inna Segal
“The Rose.” sung By Bette Milder
“just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snows
Life’s the seed that with the sun’s love
In the spring becomes the rose”
Here Are Things Parents Can Do To Help Children Feel Good About Themselves:
.Help your child learn to do things
.When teaching children how to do things, show and help them
.Praise/compliment descriptively
.Be a good role model
.Ban criticism
.https://kidshealth.org>parents›self-esteem
. Make children feel important
.Give children opportunities to stretch outside of their comfort zone
. Encourage your child to see their strengths
.Show them by your experiences
https://www.workingmomsagainstguilt.com/teaching-self-esteem-kids-love
How Do I Teach My Child To ‘Love Themselves?:’
.Focus on strengths
.Let children help and give to others
.Make them feel important. Nothing boosts your child’s self-esteem more than knowing that they’re valued/worthy and appreciated
.Ask them how they feel about themselves
.‘Loving Yourself’ isn’t being selfish” https://divethru.com/how-to-teach-kids-to-love-their-bodies/
.Read and use daily affirmations, quotations, visualizations, and vision boards pinned up all over your home, etc. so one can see them over and over again. For example: “I am important and special” or “I am proud of myself and my accomplishments.”
https://www.prodigygame.com › main-en › blog › positive
https://www.rachelhawkes-mindfulparenting.com/blog/rock-painting-make-your-own-affirmation
For More Examples of Affirmations:
https://www.romper.com/parenting/affiratmions-forkids?utm_source=pocket-newtab
The Benefits of Teaching Children to ‘Love Themselves:’
Children who have a positive view of themselves are more likely to have a growth mindset. That means they are likely to try new things, take on challenges, and cope with and learn from their mistakes better.
In Order To Feel Good About Yourself: (you and your child):
.Become mindful. People who love themselves tend to know what they think, feel, and want
.Act on/take care of what one needs rather than what one wants
.Practice good self-care
.Forgive oneself
.Become your hero for the day
.Take back one’s power
.Note your relationships
.Surround oneself with good people and a good environment
.Practice self-compassion
Here are Some Examples of Having a Positive Attitude:
.Changing your perspective. Your perspective has a powerful influence on your life and happiness
.Smiling and being kind to others
.Being concerned for others
.Being aware of one’s community
.Being happy for others’ success
.Being responsible
.Being content (not comparing self with others or siblings)
.Being appreciative
.Being self-controlled” https://www.thehomeschoolmom.com/six-important-attitudes-develop-child/
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs:
“Desire to be the most that one can be Self Actualization
Respect, self–esteem, status, recognition, strength, freedom Esteem
Friendship, family, sense of connection Love and Belonging
Personal security, health, protection from elements, Safety, Stability, order
Food, water, sleep, warmth, shelter, clothing Physiological”
Created By Connie Hamilton, author of “Hacking Questions”
Miscellaneous Thoughts About ‘Loving Yourself:’
.“’Loving yourself’ is the act of connecting with ourselves to better tune in to our truths which, in turn, shapes how we show up in life. We practice ‘loving yourself’ by being kinder and gentler to ourselves, without indulging the inner-critic and without judgment.” https://www.headspace.com/mindfulness/self-love
. Being alone (solitude) with yourself is healthy.
.“Helping with Self-Esteem/Self-Confidence/Self-Image: (“confidence in one’s own worth or abilities; self-respect)” https://languages.oup.com/google-dictionary-en/ “Self-esteem is how we value and perceive ourselves. It’s based on our opinions and beliefs about ourselves. We might also think of this as self-confidence. Your self-esteem can affect whether you like and value yourself as a person:” https://www.mind.org.uk › information-support › about…
.Listen to one’s conscience/intuition/gut/heart and thus trust/accept one’s feelings
.Mistakes can help me learn and grow by considering them as opportunities.
.Think about how would you treat a child and treat yourself that way. (Your Inner Child)
https://time.com/collection/guide-to-happiness/4070299/secret-to-happiness/
Both my daughter, grandson and the children I was teaching would sometimes ask me “Why am I here/Why am I me?” I explained that our planet is not unlike a school, and that everyone on it is a student, here to learn the meaning of life.
Possible Negativity of Too Much ‘Loving Yourself:’
.‘Loving Yourself’ doesn’t always consider the feelings of others. For example: disregarding, not understanding and not caring for others’ feeling. One may not think about how their choices affect others. This can lead to a loss of friendships and other relationships.
.As long as you are in love with yourself while loving others, not being selfish, and see a scope of growth within yourself, you’re walking in the right lane. Once ‘Loving Yourself’ turns into a massive obsession, it might lead to narcissism.”
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321309
The Following is Negative:
.A child who may have an unreasonably (or inflated) high sense of their own importance
.They need and seek too much attention and want people to admire them
.They may have a lack of empathy, be manipulative in their behavior, be emotionally fragile, have an excessive need for admiration, and feel they are entitled.
https://www.choosingtherapy.com/narcissistic-children/
Humility/Humble/Modest
. Be the Model
. Model empathy. “(Empathy) has to be infused in everything, every encounter your child sees you have, even how you cope with your own emotional difficulties.”(By Durvasula)
. Build Them Up: Instead of placing emphasis on the material items that your family possesses, place that emphasis on the actions that you take in life. Also, mention that you might not always get recognition or credit for carrying out noble duties, as these types of duties are simply how one should move through life. You can place weight on actions by taking your kids with you to volunteer or help out the community, and build them up before yourself—making sure to point out how much work they put into whatever activity you may be doing. This will teach them to do the same.
. Encourage Your Children to Own Up to Mistakes: Mistakes aren’t a bad thing. They happen all the time, and this is something that children must get familiar with.
. Step into Someone Else’s Shoes: Help your child understand that whoever they meet will know something that they don’t, and that everyone in the world has something unique to offer. With every new person comes a learning opportunity. Paying attention to other people’s perspectives helps teach humility.
. Teach your Children to consider other People’s Feelings: You want to help them to grow up thinking about other people’s feelings.
. Be Open with Your Feelings: A parent saying, “It’s okay that I am sad and it is going to be okay.” (By Durvasula)
.Discourage Entitlement: Constant positive reinforcement for actions that don’t necessarily warrant it can create a sense of entitlement in children. Someone who’s always being told how perfect and amazing they are will start to believe that they deserve more than others. It’s important to create confidence in a child, but not let it turn into overconfidence.
. Celebrate Others: It’s important for children to acknowledge other people’s efforts. This helps to cultivate personal relationships that are meaningful instead of just surface-level. Supporting and encouraging others helps to teach a child humility because, once again, they are putting others before themselves by celebrating another person.
. Control Pride: A humble child knows that they are important without it being shouted from the rooftops. Controlling pride creates a strong sense of self, and a strong sense of self in a humble child will create someone who can de-escalate an argument, include others, or allow someone to cut in line. Humility allows children to acknowledge another person’s dignity, not just their own.
. Foster your Child’s Authentic Interests (By Durvasula)
. Spend Quality Time: Setting aside 15 or 20 minutes daily either, one on one or family dinners can make a difference. (By Del Toro)
. Share Stories: History is a huge part of humility. Teaching children about historical figures who were known for their humility—like St. Vincent De Paul and Mother Teresa—is interesting and shows that humble people have an impact on the world.”
Remember the most important thing to teach a child is empathy
https://austinchildrensacademy.org/aca-blog/establishing-humility-at-a-young-age/ https://www.yahoo.com/news/narcissism-genetic-narcissists-made-not-112646250.html
For the book: How Do You ‘Help One Another?’ Finding Many Pebbles to Make a Difference in Learning about ‘Helping One Another’
Quotes:
There are also quotes in the children’s book, ‘How can You Help One Another?’
If there is no author, I couldn’t find one
‘Helping One Another’
“Somewhere along the way we must learn that there is nothing greater than to do something for others.” Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
“We can’t help everyone but everyone can help someone.” By Ronald Reagan
“Lord make me a blessing to someone today.” By Jan Karon
There is a Chinese proverb that goes: “If you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody.” For centuries, the greatest thinkers have suggested the same thing: Happiness is found in ‘helping others’/life of service
“The sole meaning of life is to serve humanity.” By Leo Tolstoy
“Just as ripples spread out when a single pebble is dropped into water, the actions of individuals can have far-reaching effects.” By Dalai Lama
“Do not let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace” By Dalai Lama
“Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.” By Buddha
“When you see something beautiful in someone, tell them. It may take you a second to say it, but for them, it could last a lifetime.” Unknown
“There is nothing more beautiful than someone who goes out of their way to make life beautiful for others.” By Mandy Hale
“To make a difference in someone’s life you don’t have to be brilliant, rich, beautiful, or perfect. You just have to care.” By Mandy Hale
“Those who are the happiest are those who do the most for others.” By Booker T. Washington
“Someone is sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago.” By Warren Buffet
“One of the great ironies of life is this: He or she who serves almost always benefits more than he or she who is served.” By Gordon B. Hinkley
“There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.” By Edith Wharton
“We cannot force someone to hear a message they are not ready to receive, but we must never underestimate the power of planting a seed.” Minds-Journal
“I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples.” By Mother Teresa
“Being of service is not enough. You must become a servant of the people. When you do, you can demand their commitment in return.” By Cesar Chavez
“Life is an echo. What you send out, comes back. What you sow, you reap. What you give, you get. What you see in others, exists in you.” By Zig Ziglar
“The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” By Gandhi
Kindness
“Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind, and the third is to be kind.” By Henry James
“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.” By Ralph Waldo Emerson
“You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late.” By Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Always be a little kinder than necessary.” By James M. Barrie
“A kind word is like a spring day.” Russian Proverb
“Kindness doesn’t cost a thing, yet it’s the richest gift you can give.” Unknown
“The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the greatest intention.” By Kahlil Gibran
“What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?” By Jean Jacques Rousseau
“A part of kindness consists in loving people more than they deserve.” By Joseph Joubert
“Kindness is the lights that dissolves all walls between souls, families, and nations.” By Paramahansa Yogananda
“Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the figure of a free people. A nation does not have to be cruel to be tough.” By Franklin Roosevelt
“Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle you know nothing about.” By Wendy Mass
“Giving kindness does us as much good as receiving it.” By Piero Ferrucci
“Imagine what our real neighborhoods would be like if each of us offered, as a matter of course, just one kind word to another person.” By Fred Rogers
“There is no effect more disproportionate to its causes than the happiness bestowed by a small compliment.” By Robert Brault
“When words are both true and kind, they can change the world.” By Buddha
“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” By Mark Twain
“You can accomplish by kindness what you cannot do by force.” By Publilius Syrus
“I expect to pass through life but once. If therefore, there be any kindness I can show, or any good things I can do to any fellow being, let me do it now, and not defer or neglect it, as I shall not pass this way again.” By William Penn
“Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust and hostility to evaporate.” By Albert Schweitzer
“Carry out a random act of kindness, with no expectation of reward, safe in the knowledge that one day someone might do the same for you.” By Princess Diana
Giving
“No one has ever become poor by giving.” By Anne Frank
“Giving back is as good for you as it is for those you are helping, because giving gives you purpose. When you have a purpose-driven life, you’re a happier person.” By Goldie Hawn
“For it is in giving that we receive.” By Saint Francis of Assisi
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment or the smallest act of caring all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” By Leo Buscaglia
You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.” By Kahlil Gibran
Empathy
“Could a greater miracle take place then for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?” By Henry David Thoreau
“Be the reason someone believes in the goodness of people.” By Karen Salmansohn
Inclusive Classrooms
“Features students of all learning styles and ability levels. For example, an inclusive classroom could have a mix of gifted students, auditory learners, visual learners and students with disabilities such as ADHD, students who are in wheelchairs, and students with executive functioning issues.” https://www.healisautism.com/post/benefits-inclusive-classroom-neurotypical-children-special-needs
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/what-does-neurotypical-mean
https://www.readstoleads.com/blog-article/how-to-write-inclusive-content
“Currently, the official definition of Inclusive education is “when all students, regardless of any challenges they may have, are placed in age-appropriate general education classes that are in their own neighborhood schools to receive high-quality instruction, interventions, and supports that enable them to meet success in the core curriculum.” https://www.texthelp.com/resources/inclusive-education/
Inclusive Playgrounds
“Welcomes children and families of all abilities to learn, play and grow together. A well-designed, inclusive playground enables children of all abilities to develop physically, cognitively, socially and emotionally.” https://www.inclusiveplaygrounds.net/
https://www.playlsi.com/en/playground-planning-tools/
https://www.pathstoliteracy.org/adding-braille-our-accessible-playground/
‘Helping One Another’
(Giving assistance or support to someone)
Every person has something negative going on that they are struggling with, only sometimes we can’t see what it is because they hide it well and suffer in silence or it can be quite evident that something is wrong.
“Everyone is going through something that we can’t see” By Kevin Love
Miscellaneous Thoughts about ‘Helping One Another’
The Golden Rule and Other Variants
“The Silver Rule has sometimes been described as the Golden Rule in a negative form. It is the Golden Rule without the gold. ‘What you do not wish done to you, do not do to others.” https://christiancourier.com/articles/gold-silver-and-iron-three-rules-of-human-conduct
“While The Golden Rule encourages individuals to treat others as they would like to be treated themselves, The Platinum Rule recognizes the importance of individual differences and enables people to adapt their behavior to meet the unique needs and preferences of others/way wants to be treated.” https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/golden-platinum-rules-neferiatiti-holt
“As opposed to “do unto others as you would have them do unto you,” as The Golden Rule states, The Platinum Rule asks you to “do unto others, wherever possible, as they would want to be done to them.”
“The Titanium Rule suggests means “do unto others according to their druthers.” (as they would like you to do)” https://www.ascend-international.com/2013/02/20/the-titanium-rule/
The Golden Rule By Norman Rockwell
https://www.scarboromissions.ca/golden-rule/golden-rule-across-the-worlds-religions
“The Golden Rule mosaic is based on a painting by well-known American artist Norman Rockwell (1894 – 1978). The painting served as the illustration for the cover of the April 1961 issue of the Saturday Evening Post, a popular magazine. Rockwell’s most well-known work is the series of oil paintings called Four Freedoms, which was inspired by a 1941 speech by USA President Franklin Delano Roosevelt (1882 – 1945). The speech centered on the idea of a postwar world based on four basic freedoms; freedom of speech, freedom of religion, freedom from want, and freedom from fear. Another recurring theme in Rockwell’s work is tolerance.
The mosaic depicts people of every race, creed, and color, with dignity and respect and touches on the theme of human rights. Inscribed on the surface of the mosaic is the Golden Rule: Do Unto Others as You Would Have Them Do Unto You. It depicts a common experience and a shared aspiration to unify the world’s religions and philosophies. In the mosaic, people of all traditions and cultures of the world are in united harmony. The artist said, ‘When I decided to attempt a picture illustrating the Golden Rule and, remembering this charcoal, hauled it out of the cellar and looked at it, I immediately felt that in the grouping of the peoples of the world behind the delegates was the basis for my picture illustrating the Golden Rule.’
The government and the people of the United States of America presented this gift to the United Nations and Secretary-General Javier Perez de Cuellar received it. It was presented by the USA’s First Lady, Nancy Reagan (1921 – 2016), on 21 October 1985, in celebration of the 40th anniversary of the United Nations. The Thanks-Giving Square Foundation arranged for the creation and finance of the mosaic.”
https://www.un.org/ungifts/golden-rule
https://displate.com/displate/5111846?pe=retro,paintings,Vintage&ctrc=US&gclid=CjwKCAjw_uGmBhBREiwAeOfsdxsmfN8s5oYcFT3_OcIBatoq9_j0_w8-z3VupmlUamaSk2D8VQhkxoCXcMQAvD_BwE
The Purpose of a Healing Cloth
“At many Early Childhood Waldorf Schools, a healing cloth is used when there is a physical disagreement between children. The child who did the hurting gets a wet healing cloth for the hurt child and places it on the child. It is a way to do sorry. The healing basket is one of our important tools, as well. If a child’s gestures have gotten away from him/her, then this child can administer the healing salve to the offended party.” The Daily Blessing of the Older Child in the Kindergarten, by Ruth Ker, Spring/Summer 2006, Issue #50
See My Book Many Pebbles to Make a Difference: Inquiring Ways You Can Improve Children’s Lives by Making Connections: Education in Different Environments By Julienne Levy Marks (the author), page 111
The Tale of the Starfish
One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed a boy picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean. Approaching the boy, he asked, “What are you doing?” The youth replied, “Throwing starfish back into the ocean. The surf is up and the tide is going out. If I don’t throw them back, they’ll die.” “Son,” the man said, “don’t you realize there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish? You can’t make a difference!” After listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up another starfish, and threw it back into the surf. Then, smiling at the man, he said, “I made a difference for that one.”
http://ataturksociety.org/the-starfish-story-original-story-by-loren-eisley/
“The Star Thrower” from THE UNEXPECTED UNIVERSE by Loren Eisley. Copyright © 1968 by Loren Eisley and renewed 1996 by John A. Eichman, III. Used by permission of Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company. All rights reserved.
Teaching Your Child to ‘Help One Another’
1. “Lead by example: Actions speak louder than words. When it comes to developing a helping nature, children learn the most from their parents. In family dinners or gatherings, when they see you helping, they feel like participating in it. Family gatherings or outings are a great way to inculcate a helping behavior in children. Be the model. The truth is our children want to be like us. So, one of the best ways to teach children about ‘helping one another’ is to model generous behaviors for and with them. Show children how excited you are to be kind this season, give back and find ways to donate or volunteer to help others. https://www.childrensmercy.org/parent-ish/2021/12/helping-others/
2. Emphasize the importance of helping: Tell your children that helping others is a trait that every good person possesses. Give them examples of people they know or look up to, from your family, friends or in the neighborhood.
3. Take them to local communities: A local community in your neighborhood, like a soup kitchen or anywhere that has to do with ‘help’, is a place where good things happen. It’s where your children can witness the goodness and helpful nature in people. It motivates them to get up and lend a hand.
4. Read stories about helpful characters: Reading to your children comes with many benefits. While choosing the books to read, make sure to pick stories that have the main characters helping others. Children often find their first heroes in the stories you read to them. After you finish reading, discuss the character with them and ask for their feedback. It will tell you how much they are inspired by it.
5. Appreciate them: A timely appreciation helps children understand the true value of their efforts. When you see them help others, give them a slow clap or describe what they are doing and how it is helping others. Children, whether they show it or not, secretly crave their parent’s admiration. When you appreciate their efforts, they will try harder to do a better job the next time.” https://nurturey.com/blog/teach-your-child-to-help-others-in-5-simple-steps/
“A ‘helping’ nature ensures a happy and successful life. The more your children ‘help one another,’ the better they do, in life. They are respected for their efforts and they build a strong character for themselves. And nothing satisfies a parent more than knowing they have raised a good human being.” https://brilliantio.com ›why-is-helping-others-important
What Do Children Learn From ‘Helping One Another?’
“As children acquire a realistic perspective, they may become disillusioned when they consider how much help the world needs. But if you allow them to take part in charitable projects and other means of helping people, they’ll feel a strong sense of ability to effect change in people’s lives.” https://www.ef.com/wwen/blog/efacademyblog/importance-giving-back-to-your-community/
“It helps their sense of ‘Agency’ which is ‘being able to make choices and decisions to influence events and to have an impact on one’s world.’” https://www.ourxplor.com/respecting-a-childs-sense-of-agency-and-belonging
What is the Main Idea of ‘Helping One Another?’
. “It means the ability to impact the lives of others in a positive manner. It could be as simple as teaching someone a new skill or teaching them something they previously didn’t know. It could be teaching something that has multiple steps in complexity.” https://time.com/collection/guide-to-happiness/4070299/secret-to-happiness/
. I strongly believe that ‘Helping One Another’ should be part of the curriculum as children need to learn how and why to help and engage with others.
. To try to ‘help one another’ feel better is a great goal to have.
. I believe that one reason we are here on this earth is to ‘Help One Another.’
. “’Helping One Another’ is thought to be one of the ways that people create, maintain, and strengthen their social connections.” https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk › explore-mental-health
Other Types of Ways of ‘Helping One Another’
By using the Buddy Bench, Talking Circles, and a Talking Stick we can learn about taking turns, listening to others, having everyone have a chance to speak and share, helping someone who may be lonely, etc. which is all a part of ‘Helping One Another.’
Buddy Benches
“Buddy Benches were invented to combat loneliness and bullying in schools. Sometimes called a friendship bench, these benches are provided on school playgrounds as a way for students to signal to others that they are feeling lonely and isolated and need a friend to play with or someone to talk to. The bench allows other children on the playground to clearly see when another kid needs support or a friend, and they can join them on the bench for a chat or invite them to play.” https://pollyproducts.com/buddy-benches-why-they-are-important-for-your-school/
I Have Used Talking Circles and Talking Sticks in my Classrooms and Library Classes
By using the above, we all learn about taking turns, listening to others, having everyone have a chance, and helping someone who may be lonely.
Talking Circles
“Talking Circles can be used for discussion, problem solving, and/or decision making. The basic purpose of a talking circle is to create a safe, non-judgmental place where each participant has the opportunity to contribute to the discussion of difficult and/or important issues.” https://www.heartland.edu/documents/idc/talkingcircleclassroom.pdf
http://firstnationspedagogy.ca/circletalks.html
The Talking Stick
“The Talking Stick is a listening and speaking method that can be used in the classroom, (or at the home) which is democratic and encourages understanding between students from culturally diverse backgrounds. This method incorporates an open style of listening, within a space of silence.”
http://iteslj.org/Techniques/Fujioka-TalkingStick.html
https://www.du.edu/conflict-resolution/news/significance-talking-stick
https://nidhi0113.wordpress.com/2013/06/06/talking-stick-in-the-classroom/
Please see Many Pebbles to Make a Difference: Inspiring Ways You Can Improve Children’s Lives by Making Connections: Education in Different Environments By Julienne Levy Marks (the author) pages 74-76, 78-79 and Many Pebbles to Make a Difference: Inspiring Ways You Can Improve Children’s Lives by Making Connections: Reading and Books By Julienne Levy Marks (the author) pages 152, 166-167 for more information about the Talking Circle and Talking Stick. Published by Yawn Publishers. https://yawnspublishing.com/
What is the True Meaning of ‘Helping One Another?’
“Researchers often define ‘Helping One Another’ as the intention or the effect of improving the welfare of another without the expectation of material rewards in return.” www.berkeleywellbeing.com
I believe to give with an open heart. What someone does with your gift has nothing to do with you.
Websites with Samples of Things to Do to ‘Help One Another’
“Play a cooperative, team-building game with friends. Playworks is a non-profit organization that supports learning and physical health among children. It’s a great resource with a number of examples of team-based games for children.” https://www.gokids.com.tw/tsaiss/Peaceable%20Kingdom/Rules/GMC7_Dinosaur%20Escape.pdf
https://www.jsonline.com/story/life/home-garden/garden/2017/04/06/5-easy-diy-bird-feeders/100041276/
https://themanylittlejoys.com/kid-made-bird-feeders/
https://www.doinggoodtogether.org/bhf/write-letters-to-a-soldier
https://www.operationgratitude.com/
https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/a34330608/where-to-donate-toys/
https://www.nomeangirls.com/resources-1/2019/5/21/you-dont-have-to-like-everyone-but-always-be-kind
https://coffeeandcarpool.com/why-our-kids-dont-need-to-be-nice/
https://www.hup.harvard.edu/catalog.php?isbn=9780674965904
https://zenhabits.net/25-ways-to-help-a-fellow-human-being-today/
https://www.businessinsider.com/teachers-prefer-kindness-over-good-grades-2016-10
Miscellaneous Thoughts about Kindness
. “Kindness, or doing good, often means putting other people’s needs before our own. Kindness is choosing to do something that helps others or yourself, motivated by genuine warm feelings.” https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/explore-mental-health/kindness/kindness-matters-guide
. “Kindness means thinking of others and acting in ways that contribute to their happiness.” https://time.com/5233398/raise-grateful-children/?utm_source=pocket_collection_story
. “Kindness puts others at the center. It is not focused on how it will benefit us or how many likes we can get on social media. True kindness, above all, comes from a place of compassion, understanding, and goodwill.” https://berkeleywellbeing.com
. “‘Pay It Forward’ is an expression for describing the beneficiary of a good deed repaying the kindness to others rather than paying it back to the original benefactor.” (also a movie) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pay_it_forward
. “The hardest part of teaching children to be kind is helping them stay kind when other people are mean to them.” https://coffeeandcarpool.com/encourage-kids-to-be-kind-when-kids-are-mean-to-them/
. Genuinely compliment others. Complimenting others is an easy way to show kindness. It helps others feel seen, releasing a boost of endorphins associated with the reward centers of the brain.
. “Complimenting someone for their looks, which is largely a result of genetics and out of the individual’s control, also reduces that person’s worth to what they look like and reinforces the message that it’s more important for women to be beautiful than it is to be intelligent, strong, or a great leader, friend, or mentor.”
https://shedefined.com.au/life/how-and-why-to-give-women-compliments-that-arent-based-on-appearance/
. (Describe) “Descriptive praise is when you tell your child exactly what it is that you like. For example, ‘I like the way you’ve found a spot for everything in your room.’ This helps your child understand exactly what it is that they’ve done well. It’s also more genuine than non-specific praise like ‘You’re a good boy.’”
https://raisingchildren.net.au/toddlers/connecting-communicating/connecting/praise
. See the book, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids will Talk By Faber and Mazlish
. Say/write a genuine ‘thank you’ and ‘I’m sorry’ and do amends/restitution. (‘What should we do to help her feel better?’)
. Some other words that show kindness: connection with/to others, listen to self and others, treat others humanely, concern, consideration, nurture, love, cherish.
https://selecthealth.org/blog/2020/11/9-ways-to-show-kindness
. Kindness is about relationships, connections/engagement.
https://www.kindness.org/ A great organization
. At the end of the day do you (or your child) want to be remembered for how kind you are/were and what good you did? I do.
https://naturespath.com/blogs/posts/17-activities-kids-practice-kindness-compassion
“Try these Six Tips for Teaching Children to be Kind
1. Discuss What Kindness Means and Looks Like.
2. Use Play Pretend, Games, and Stories
3. Be an Example of Kindness
4. Promote Kindness Through Selfless Habits and Experiences.
5. Help Them Understand That Kindness Isn’t Always Easy
6. Focus on How It Feels to Be Kind” https://www.harpercollins.com/blogs/harperkids/6-tips-for-teaching-kids-kindness
Some Research about Kindness
“A recent study reported on how people felt after performing or observing kind acts every day for seven days. Participants were randomly assigned to carry out at least one more kind act than usual for someone close to them, an acquaintance or stranger, or themselves, or to try to actively observe kind acts. Happiness was measured before and after the seven days of kindness. The researchers found that being kind to ourselves or to anyone else — yes, even a stranger — or actively observing kindness around us boosted happiness.” https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/the-heart-and-science-of-kindness-2019041816447
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29702043/
“Kindness is contagious and it has the potential to make the world a better place. Practicing kindness may also have many health benefits such as lowering pain levels, relieving stress and anxiety, and increasing life expectancy. When we show kindness, we are healing others and ourselves at the same time. Kindness has been shown to increase self-esteem, empathy and compassion, and improve mood. It can decrease blood pressure and cortisol, a stress hormone, which directly impacts stress levels. People who give of themselves in a balanced way also tend to be healthier and live longer.” https://www.mayoclinichealthsystem.org/hometown-health/speaking-of-health/the-art-of-kindness
Be Kind to Yourself
“When sharing kindness, it’s not just how you treat other people — it’s also about how you extend those same behaviors and intentions to yourself. Be kinder in your own self-talk and practice gratitude.” https://www.mayoclinichealthsystem.org/hometown-health/speaking-of-health/the-art-of-kindness
When you are feeling down, try doing something kind for someone else.
Sympathy
“Sympathy is more of a feeling of pity for another. It is being kind, understanding and showing concern for others when they are sad, suffering, or having trouble.” https://kids.wordsmyth.net/we/?rid=41782&ent_l=sympathy
Miscellaneous Thoughts about Empathy
Empathy is our ability to understand how someone feels. https://www.drstevesilvestro.com/teaching-kids-empathy-and-compassion
When you teach empathy to children, you are helping them understand other people’s feelings.
What You Can Do To Help Children Develop Empathy
. “Empathize with your child. For example, ‘Are you feeling scared of that dog?’
. Talk about others’ feelings
. Suggest how children can show empathy
. Read stories about feelings
. Be a role model
. Use “I” messages
. Validate your child’s difficult emotions
. Use pretend play or role playing” https://www.beginlearning.com/parent-resources/teaching-kids-empathy/
. Putting yourself/standing/walking in someone else’s shoes means putting yourself in the other person’s shoes; to see from another’s point of view/perspective/position; to feel what another feels due to their perception; to look at the same situation and see it differently; a respectful understanding of what others are feeling.
. “Standing in someone else’s shoes is one of the things Atticus, said to Scout, meaning “you never really understand a person until you consider things from his or her point of view and until you climb into its skin and walk around in it.” from To Kill a Mockingbird By Lee https://www.ipl.org/essay/To-Kill-A-Mockingbird-Walking-In-Someone-
. “Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes.” In effect, it is a reminder to practice empathy. While long credited as a Native American quote replacing the word shoes with moccasins, the saying almost certainly is derived from a Mary T. Lathrap poem published in 1895.” (Native American) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zh55e6U_XPM
https://amodernmother.com/my-daughters-best-friend-is-moving.html
Compassion
Compassion in Latin means ‘to suffer with.’
Compassion is when we take a step away from the emotion of empathy and ask ourselves ‘How can we help?’ It is also saying: ‘How can I be a blessing to someone today/ serve others?’
How to Teach Children a Compassionate Spirit and Desire to Help Others
. “Be the model.
. Talk about helping others
. Let them guide the giving (using their interests)
. Find a new tradition” https://www.childrensmercy.org/parent-ish/2021/12/helping-others/ https://meaningfulmama.com/day-339-compassion-role-playing.html
Self- Compassion
“Don’t forget that self-compassion is just as important and essential as showing kindness to those around you. If you are unable to accept self-compassion and find value/worth in yourself, it will be harder to spread kindness.” https://selecthealth.org/blog/2020/11/9-ways-to-show-kindness
“Ever notice how much better you treat others when you’ve taken care of yourself? When we are compassionate, we are recognizing our shared human condition. Compassion can guide us to acts of kindness.” https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/the-heart-and-science-of-kindness-2019041816447
Giving
Here are Some Suggestions to Make the Concept and the Act of Giving a Part of your Regular Interactions with your Children
Benefits of Giving
. “Giving makes us feel happy
. Giving is good for health. It can relieves stress and improves emotional well-being
. Giving helps build social connection
. Giving evokes gratitude
. Giving is contagious
. Giving is doing something for someone else and expecting nothing in return” https://www.kent-teach.com/Blog/post/2017/11/28/5-benefits-of-giving.aspx
. Builds a sense of purpose https://www.worldvision.org.ph/5-reasons-why-giving-is-good-for-you/
.“Teach what it means to share
. Model generosity/ Lead by example. Talk about why you give
. Talk about your feelings when you give
. Talk about giving as a family/class
. Do it together
. Descriptively praise the giving impulse
. Create opportunities
. Share your stories
. Making Giving Real
. Use gift-giving occasions to teach about giving
.Be patient. “Focus on the Good Intentions of your Children” By Deb Cohen, Certified Parenting Educator
.“Encourage your child to choose their toys, clothes, and books to donate
. Look for volunteer opportunities
. Have a three-bucket approach for allowances. A part of their allowance be for things they want to spend it on, some for saving, and some for giving back
. Set up a donor-advised fund.” https://www.parents.com/parenting/money/teach-kids-charity-giving/
. “Find causes your child cares about. Your child is more likely to develop a habit of giving back when he or she is passionate about the cause. Start by brainstorming the possibilities of who your child can help that he is really interested in, such as their classmates, animals, the homeless, the environment, etc. Then, encourage him or her to identify what talents to offer in service. Examples: Does he love to bake? Does she enjoy music or caring for animals?”
. Give and volunteer together. When your children see you volunteering your time, talent and treasure, they see your values at work.” https://www.jtownchamber.com/5-ways-to-teach-your-children-to-give-back/
https://www.feedingamerica.org/hunger-blog/what-difference-between-food-bank-and-food-pantry
https://careerandrecovery.org/2021/12/can-homeless-people-get-jobs/
. “If your child loves animals, volunteering time or giving support to an animal shelter might be a good choice. There is no reason why being generous can’t also feed a child’s personal interests. Children are more likely to be sincere in their helping efforts when they personally care about the cause. Teaching compassion for animals is a great way to practice empathy, children are naturally drawn to animals and love to help them.” https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/explore-mental-health/kindness/kindness-matters-guide
. “Native Americans give away something that is meaningful to them.” https://www.nighteaglewilderness.com/post/the-give-away-ceremony-a-lakota-tradition
. “The richest people are those who are willing to give away everything they own.” https://squaxinisland.org/visitors/native-american-etiquette/
. “In some countries on your birthday one gives presents to others. For example, in Russia even the guests receive gifts from the person whose birthday it is.” https://giftii.com/blogs/gift-ideas/curious-gifting-traditions-around-the-world
. “Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Day of Service takes place each year on the third Monday in January and is the only federal holiday that is also designated by Congress as a National Day of Service to encourage all Americans to volunteer to improve their communities. It is a ‘day on, not a day off.’” https://www.doi.gov/pmb/eeo/mlk-day-service
Caring
The Difference between Kindness and Caring
“In order to be kind, we need to focus on the other person’s feelings and needs, while caring involves taking actions that help someone out even if we don’t know them very well.” https://differencess.com/kind-vs-caring-whats-the-difference
How to Teach Your Child to Care for Others
. “Acknowledge Acts of Kindness. If your child does something nice for you or someone else, tell them! (thank them)
. Encourage Your Child to be Adventurous
. Prioritize Face-to-Face Conversations
. Celebrate Differences
. Be a Consistent Role Model
. Talk About Your Feelings” https://tobeme.com.au/how-to-teach-your-child-to-care-for-others/
Volunteering
Real Volunteering (not just for school hours)
. “Volunteering and helping others can help us feel a sense of belonging, make new friends, and connect with our communities.” https://www.highschoolcube.com/volunteering-in-high-school-pros-and-cons/
https://kidshealth.org/en/kids/volunteering.html
. Please also see my book, Many Pebbles to Make a Difference: Inspiring Ways You Can Improve Children’s Lives by Making Connections: For Families, Parents, Grandparents By Julienne Levy Marks, “Volunteering as a Family to Help Others,” pages 68-70
Health Issues/Concerns/Disabilities
I need to share here that it seems there are several different words that are used for the same word. Many may be outdated or not politically correct. I have tried with my books and in the website to use respectful words. I have never wanted to/meant to offend anyone. https://www.aucd.org/docs/add/sa_summits/Language%20Doc.pdf
Please note there is some conflict about what/ which word to use for “disabled.” https://www.forbes.com/sites/andrewpulrang/2020/09/30/here-are-some-dos-and-donts-of-disability-language/?
“‘person with a disability’ and ‘individual with an amputation’ emphasizes the person and not his or her condition.” https://www.apa.org/pi/disability/resources/choosing-words
“An individual with a health issue is first and foremost an individual. The emphasis should be on the person not the health condition. Ex. a child with Down syndrome” https://www.dsaneo.org/families/about-down-syndrome/proper-language/
“For most diseases, disabilities, and disorders, only proper names, as in a person’s name, are capitalized.” https://www.acs.org/about/diversity/inclusivity-style-guide/disabilities-disorders-and-other-health-conditions.html#when-and-how-to-mention-someones-health
In my book, ‘Helping One Another’ and here on the website, there are only a few Health Issues that are addressed. There of course more/others.
I have chosen in my books to use the words ‘Health Issues.’
Part of ‘Helping One Another’ is helping others who may have Health Issues, as well as everyone.
Miscellaneous Definitions/Explanations
One aspect of ‘Helping One Another’ is accepting differences of others: physical, emotional, culturally, etc.
. “Intellectual disability is a term used when there are limits to a person’s ability to learn at an expected level and function in daily life. Levels of intellectual disability vary greatly in children.” https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/developmentaldisabilities/facts-about-intellectual-disability.html
https://www.24hrcares.com/resource-center/invisible-vs-visible-disabilities
. “Holland Bloorview Kids Rehabilitation Hospital is taking a bold step in ending ableism for children and youth with disabilities. Ableism is the discrimination towards someone based on their abilities, often favoring those who do not have a disability and seeing less value in those that do. And it needs to stop. Over the past four years, Holland Bloorview’s ‘Dear Everybody Campaign’ has been confronting personal and systemic ableism and this year we’re calling on the community to join in.”
https://deareverybody.hollandbloorview.ca/
. “Ableism describes assumptions and attitudes that reinforce notions of normality and devalue those who fall outside its parameters.”
https://www.sapiens.org/culture/ordinary-future-ableism-parenting/?utm_source=pocket-newtab-en-us
. “Discrimination in favor of able-bodied people, a person with a disability can struggle with ableism.” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ableism
. “Altruism (or selflessness) is concern for the well-being of others. A truly altruistic act is something done completely for the benefit of another, without concern for the self.” https://kids.kiddle.co/Altruism
. “When we give to others it activates the areas of the brain associated with pleasure, social connection and trust. Altruistic behavior releases endorphins in the brain and boosts happiness for us as well as the people we help. Altruism inspires young people by directing their attention outward and providing an opportunity to experience the value of helping others. Kindness, compassion, gratitude, empathy and many other positive qualities emerge when children learn that helping others is also a great way to help themselves.” https://actionforhappiness.org/10-keys-to-happier-living/do-things-for-others
Types of Disabilities/Health Conditions/Issues with Definitions/Explanations
In my Book on “Helping One Another’ are short explanations (in chart form) for the child readers explaining about some specific health conditions/issues. I also ask the children to talk to you (the adult) for more of an explanation. I hope the websites below will help you with this and give you more information.
Little People (The better word to use)
A dwarf has disproportion of body parts.
https://www.diffen.com/difference/Dwarf_vs_Midget
http://understandingdwarfism.com/explain-dwarfism-to-young-children
Wheelchair Use
https://www.urevolution.com/blogs/magazine/wheelchair-questions-from-kids
https://nmeda.org/tips-on-choosing-an-accessible-van-for-children-with-special-needs/
. “Wheelchair-accessible vans for children with special needs should have access to safe transportation for numerous reasons, including medical appointments, therapy, and school.” https://www.cerebralpalsyguidance.com/cerebral-palsy/living/wheelchair-accessible-vans/
. “Car accidents are the leading cause of spinal injury.” https://mileylegal.com/spinal-injury-from-car-accident/
. “Self-propelled wheelchairs can be propelled by users themselves by using push-rims fitted on rear wheels. They also come with pushing handles, which makes it easy to be pushed by another person, if need be. Their larger rear wheels are an advantage when you need to push the chair over an obstacle.” https://www.mobilitysmart.co.uk/blog.html
Deafness
. Video of Signing ‘I Like You’ https://www.lifeprint.com/asl101/pages-signs/l/like.htm
. People using sign language make shapes, called signs, with their hands and arms. They also move their bodies and make facial expressions. Signs can stand for letters, words, or ideas.” https://kids.britannica.com/kids/article/sign-language/399595
https://www.lingvano.com/asl/blog/how-deaf-people-think
“People who learned to talk before becoming deaf often have it easier and speak clearer. This is because there’s already a familiarity with some sounds and qualities that are associated with spoken language.” https://www.healthline.com/health/can-deaf-people-talk#about-spoken-language
https://www.verywellhealth.com/what-does-deaf-speech-sound-like-1048743
. “Hearing aids are small electronic or battery-operated devices that can amplify and change sound. They are used by people with hearing loss.” https://www.childrensnational.org/get-care/health-library/hearing-aids
Limb Differences/Leg Length Discrepancy
“A limb-length discrepancy is when one leg or arm is shorter than the other leg or arm. The difference in length can range from a fraction of an inch to several inches. Some children are born with congenital limb differences that cause their legs or arms to grow at different rates.”
https://www.childrenshospital.org/conditions/limb-length-discrepancy
https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/limb-deformities.html
https://www.bookbaskets.com.au/blog/books-about-children-with-limb-difference/
Autism Spectrum Disorder
Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is a “neurological and developmental disorder that affects how people interact with others, communicate, learn, and behave.” https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/autism-spectrum-disorders-asd
https://www.readingrockets.org/topics/autism-spectrum-disorder/articles/getting-comfortable-
https://www.psycom.net/autism-top-questions
https://www.khabar.com/magazine/spiritual-straight-talk/autism
“Includes Asperger’s syndrome, a mild form of autism. Communication training and behavioral therapy can help people with the syndrome learn to socialize more successfully.” https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-1-d&q=asperger%27s+syndrome+definition
Blindness
“Blindness is the inability to see or a lack of vision.” https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24446-blindness
Vision Impairment
“Visual impairment usually means that someone’s eyesight is reduced (impaired) to the extent that it can’t be corrected to a normal level. This means full correction is not even possible with the help of glasses, contact lenses, medication or vision surgery.” https://www.allaboutvision.com/conditions/lowvision/visual-impairment/
Glasses
“Glasses work by ending light before it enters your eye by just the right amount to correct for the error for your eye’s lens.” www.tappityapp.com>answers.how-do-glasses-work
https://aapos.org/glossary/glasses-for-children
Braille
“Braille is a system that allows blind people to read and write.” https://kids.britannica.com/kids/article/Braille/352878
https://wecapable.com/braille-translator/braille-to-english-text/
https://www.pathstoliteracy.org/adding-braille-our-accessible-playground/
Crossed- Eyes
“Strabismus, a misalignment of the eyes, is one of the most common eye problems in children, affecting approximately 4 percent of children under the age of six years. The eyes (one or both) may turn inward, outward, turn up, or turn down. At times, more than one of these conditions are present. Strabismus is also called “wandering eye” or “crossed-eyes.” Treatment for this condition: Surgery to straighten the eyes, Eye exercises, Eye patch over the strong eye (if amblyopia is present) to improve the weak eye.” https://www.chop.edu/conditions-diseases/crossed-eyes-strabismus
Service Animals
“Various definitions exist for a service animal. The Americans with Disabilities Act defines the term as “dogs that are individually trained to do work or perform tasks for people with disabilities”. Dogs are the most common service animals, having assisted people since at least 1927.” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Service_animal
Service animals/dogs’ job is to keep their “person” safe and should be seen and treated as an extension of the person.
A Service Dog or Seeing Eye Dog or Guide Dog is a “dog that has been specially trained to lead or guide a blind person in walking about.” https://www.tpt.org/post/kids-service-dogs/
“One of the biggest and most obvious differences between a guide dog and white cane is that a guide dog is trained to avoid obstacles along their pathway. A white cane helps locate impediments so that the blind person can decide how best to maneuver around them.” https://clovernook.org/2020/09/18/guide-dogs-vs-white-canes-the-comprehensive-comparison/
https://brailleworks.com/child-who-is-blind-needs-white-cane/
“Blind people hear better – this is not only the result of necessary training, in which blind people learn, among other things, to compensate for their lack of vision with their sense of hearing. It is also due to the neurological development of the brain. This has been proven by research in which the brain activities of blind people were studied.” https://www.kind.com/en-sg/magazine/how-we-hear/blind-people-hear-better/
Down syndrome
“Sometimes halting use of language, rocky pronunciation of certain words, mannerisms that don’t strictly follow tacit social norms, the trademark physical features of Down syndrome.”
Life goes on TV series https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life_Goes_On_(TV_series)
“Down for Love (TV series) A heartwarming quest for love, this feel-good reality show follows several people with Down syndrome as they navigate the trials and triumphs of dating. A heartwarming quest for love, this feel-good reality show follows several people with Down syndrome as they navigate the trials and triumphs of dating.” https://www.netflix.com/title/81599745
Alopecia Areata
“Alopecia Areata is a disease that develops when the body’s immune system attacks hair follicles (what holds the hair in place), causing hair loss. You can lose hair anywhere on your body, including your scalp, inside your nose, and in your ears. Some people lose their eyelashes or eyebrows.” https://www.pfizer.com/disease-and-conditions/alopecia-areata
“Our mission is to restore confidence, happiness and pride to anyone struggling with low self-esteem during their medical journey, especially bald children. Our vision is a world where every child goes to sleep proud of their differences. We accomplish this by donating Smile Kits inclusive of paints, brushes and canvases to children’s hospitals and charity organizations around the world. Children can paint and customize their very own head scarves, neck scarves and superhero capes. Each Smile Kit provides a child an outlet of creativity, and the ability to wear their masterpiece with a smile.” https://www.cominguprosies.com/
Prosthesis
“A prosthesis is an artificial device to replace or augment a missing or impaired part of the body.” www.merriam-webster.com>dictionary>prosthesis
https://medlineplus.gov/ency/article/002286.htm
During the summer of the early 1970’s I was working at a day camp. The camp hired an excellent horseback riding person who happened to have a prosthesis for an arm. Sometimes she wore it and other times she didn’t. (It was hot in New York.) Many of the parents were upset that their children would be disturbed by this. Therefore she had to become a counselor for a group. To this day I remember how badly I felt for her.
Dyslexia
“Dyslexia is the difficulty in reading that is not associated with impairment of intellect, vision, or recognition of letters.” https://dyslexiaida.org/definition-of-dyslexia/
Aphasia
“Aphasia is a brain disorder where a person has trouble speaking or understanding other people speaking. This happens with damage or disruptions in parts of the brain that control spoken language. It often happens with conditions like a stroke. Aphasia is often treatable, and speech therapy can still help people who have this condition permanently.” https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/5502-aphasia
The following first paragraph of What are Learning Disabilities is taken directly from my Book, ‘How Can You Help One Another?’ Finding Many Pebbles to Make a Difference in Learning about ‘Helping One Another’ as I felt it important for parents to peruse.
What are Learning Disabilities?
“Some of us, children and adults, have learning disabilities or learning disorders which is a name or umbrella terms for a wide variety of learning problems. Sometimes people’s brains are simply wired differently – and this difference affects how they receive and process information. Children and adults with learning disabilities see, hear, and understand things differently. It is different than physical conditions because you can’t see them. A learning disability is not a problem with intelligence or motivation and children with this condition aren’t lazy or dumb. In fact, most are just as smart as everyone else.”
“Some of these conditions can lead to trouble with learning new information and skills, and putting them to use. The most common types of learning disabilities involve problems with reading, writing, math, reasoning, listening, and speaking.” https://www.helpguide.org/articles/autism-learning-disabilities/learning-disabilities-and-disorders.htm
“Are ADD and ADHD the same thing? Yes, ADD and ADHD are the same thing. ADD (attention-deficit disorder) is an outdated term for what is now called ADHD. Some children with ADHD have hyperactive behaviors and some don’t, but the diagnosis is ADHD either way.” https://childmind.org/article/what-is-the-difference-between-add-and-adhd
https://raisingchildren.net.au/school-age/development/adhd/friendships-children-pre-teens-adhd
Symptoms of ADD: https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/adhd/symptoms-causes/syc-20350889
Things One Can Do With Children that Have ADD
https://chadd.org/adhd-in-the-news/games-puzzles-and-adhd/
Disability Terminology Chart
“When referring to people with disabilities, choose words that reflect dignity and respect. Use language that describes the person’s disability without defining the individual as his or her disability. The following are just some examples.
INAPPROPRIATE APPROPRIATE
The disabled, the handicapped People with disabilities, the disability community
Crippled, suffers from, afflicted with, stricken with, has disability, is a person with
Normal person, healthy, whole People without disabilities, able bodied, person who is able to walk, who can see, etc.
The blind, the deaf Person who is blind, person who is deaf or hard of hearing
Wheelchair bound, confined or restricted to a Person who uses a wheelchair, wheelchair, wheelchair user
Handicap parking Accessible parking, parking for People with disabilities
Dumb, mute Person who cannot speak, has Difficulty speaking, uses synthetic speech, Non-verbal, non-vocal
Tongue-tied Speech disability, speech disorder Or Communication disability
CP victim, spastic Person with cerebral palsy
Crippled, lame, deformed Person with a disability, walks
With a cane, uses leg braces
Epileptic Person with epilepsy, with seizure disorder
Fit, attack Seizure, epileptic
Episode or event
Crazy, maniac, lunatic, insane, nuts, deranged, People with emotional
Psycho, demented, retard, defective disorders, mental
Idiot, slow illness, mental health
Disability, psychiatric
Imbecile, feeble-minded, Down’s person, Person with a
Mongoloid developmental
Disability, person
With mental
Retardation, person with
A developmental
Delay, person with Down
Syndrome or person
Who is brain injured,
Has traumatic brain injury, brain damage with a closed head
Injury.
Slow learner, retarded Person who has a learning
Disability
Dwarf, midget Short stature, little person
Paraplegic, quadriplegic Person with spinal cord injury,
man with paraplegia man with paraplegia,
Woman who is paralyzed
Birth defect congenital disability,
Birth anomaly
A post-polio, suffered from polio has had polio, experienced polio
Homebound Stay-at-home,
Hard for person to get out
Senile, demented Person with Alzheimer’s disease,
Person who has dementia”
https://www.courts.ca.gov/partners/documents/7-terminology.pdf
Miscellaneous About Things Talked about in the Book ‘Helping One Another’)
10 Strategies for Talking to Children about Disability (Health Issues/Conditions)
I will be using all of the above words below
I felt the following information would be so helpful to parents so I have shared it in full.
“Whether it is a person who uses a wheelchair that you see in the grocery store, a child in their class that has Autism, or a sibling with ADHD, your child has someone in their life that has a health issue that they might have questions about. Talking openly and honestly about these health conditions with your children is a critical first step in living in a more inclusive community that celebrates and embraces diversity.
1. Embrace your child’s curiosity. Children are naturally curious and highly observant. They are constantly taking in new information and learning about the world, themselves and each other. Research has shown that babies start to notice differences in race as early as six months old, are able to notice gender differences by the time they are one and by three years old they are able to notice differences in physical ability. Diversity is a critical piece of the human experience, yet, adults are often hesitant to talk about differences with children because they don’t want to draw attention to them. However, whether or not you talk about differences be that of race, gender, or ability, children notice them. By not talking openly and allowing children to ask their questions, youngsters are taught that it is a rude or taboo topic.
So let children ask their questions. When your child asks a question about someone with a health issue consider it an opportunity to talk about a new and interesting topic rather than turning health condition into a topic to be avoided.
2. Be honest and direct. Give direct answers to your child’s inquiry. For example, if a child asks, “Why can’t she walk?” if you reply with a response like, “Oh, we don’t need to talk about that right now” or “It’s okay that she doesn’t’ walk, she has her wheelchair to help her” you are not really answering their question and the child is left wondering. Instead, you could say “Are you curious about how Ruth moves? We can go talk to her and ask her to tell us more about herself if you’d and she’d like.”
With younger children a simple statement will normally give them what they are looking for. For example, in response to the question “What is that thing in his stomach?” you could reply, “This is Jack’s feeding tube. Some people eat through their mouth like you do, and others eat through their stomach like Jack.” Simple. Honest. Direct.
As children get older, you may give a more complex response such as “Some youngsters have medical problems that make it hard for them to get enough nutrition by mouth. A g-tube is a tube that brings food directly to the stomach. It’s one of the ways doctors can make sure children who have trouble eating get the food they need to grow.”
By elementary age or middle school children become more aware of less-visible disabilities like those associated with learning or behavior. Again, try to answer your child’s questions with facts and be honest. If you don’t know much about the person your child is asking about, find a way to respectfully talk with that child’s family or teachers to learn more or facilitate a conversation between the children themselves.
3. Avoid making assumptions and interpretations. Whether you know the person your child is asking about or not, avoid adding your interpretation of how a person may feel about their health condition or what caused it. You don’t know what that person is feeling or experiencing if you haven’t taken the time to get to know them.
There are many assumptions and misconceptions about health issues that hide under the surface of our interactions such as “people with health conditions are special and should be treated differently” or “people with health issues lives are hard and challenging.” These incorrect assumptions stem from fear, lack of understanding and/or prejudice. You can help your children talk about health issues in a more accurate and respectful way by avoiding assumptions and taking the time to get to know someone on an individual level.
4. Keep your explanations positive. Children are like sponges. If you use positive language with your child, they will continue to use that kind of language on their own. For example, explain that hearing aids help others hear and wheelchairs help others move around, instead of using a negative connotation. (he can’t hear, she can’t walk, etc.)
Use the term “disability,” and take the following terms out of your vocabulary when talking about or talking to people with disabilities. Don’t use the terms “handicapped,” “differently-abled,” or “special needs” or “retarded” as these terms frame disability as a negative thing and thus further perpetuate the exclusion, isolation and negative stigma of people with disabilities.
5. Lead by example. Children look to adults for guidance on how to act, especially if they are in a new or unfamiliar setting. If you stare, point, quietly move to the other side of the street, whisper about someone, talk down to, or raise your voice high like you would a little child when talking to someone with a disability, your child will see, hear and internalize those behaviors and knee-jerk reactions. Take the time to become aware of your own attitudes, beliefs and assumptions around disability before talking to your children. When you begin talking with your child about disability, actively counter any negative attitudes or beliefs you may have developed. If you approach someone with kindness, openness, respect and curiosity your children will do the same.
6. Prepare for tough questions and avoid shushing their questions. It is not uncommon for children to ask questions like, “What’s wrong with that girl?” When an adult hears this, they often try to shush their children. They are embarrassed that their child said something rude and potentially hurtful to another person. However, it is key to remember that children are not trying to be rude, they are trying to make sense of what they are seeing. A question like that however can be damaging if not addressed in an appropriate way. Explain to your youngsters that there is nothing wrong with people with disabilities. Explain that a child may have trouble talking or difficulty in a group situation but that doesn’t mean there’s something “wrong” with them.”
Here are Examples of some Tough Questions we get Asked Often at the Seattle PlayGarden
(A Garden for Everyone, the Seattle PlayGarden is a 1-acre fully-fenced garden in the heart of Seattle. Our mission is to provide children of all abilities a safe, accessible, and adventurous place to play. https://seattleplaygarden.org/)
. Is he really 5?
. Why can’t she walk?
. Can he talk? Will he learn how to talk?
. What’s that thing? (in reference to… tracheostomy tube, a g-tube, a ventilator, or orthotics).
. Why does she make those sounds?
. Why does she always do that? (in reference to self-stimulating behaviors)
. What is that in her stomach? (in reference to a g-tube)
. Why does he eat that way?
.Why doesn’t________come to circle time?
https://childrensplaygarden.org/playgarden-story/
7. Talk about human diversity (and neuro-diversity) with your children. We are all different in some way and that we all do things every day to adjust to our unique circumstances. For example, someone who wears glass uses them to correct blurry vision, just as someone who is non-verbal may use an assistive device like an IPad to communicate. None of these things are “wrong” they are just different ways of being in the world. Children use the word ‘wrong’ because they have been socialized by adults and society’s attitudes about what is considered ‘normal’ versus ‘abnormal.’
https://www.khabar.com/magazine/spiritual-straight-talk/isyour child normal? A great article
We can expand the notion of “normal” by talking about neurodiversity with children and talking about how ALL body types, ways of moving, communicating, thinking and behaving are normal and healthy.
8. Emphasize similarities and shared interests. Avoid focusing solely on differences, doing so sends the message that people with disabilities are inherently different than the other children. Instead, emphasize similarities. ALL children are children first and foremost and everyone wants the same things- to have friends, to play, to be loved, to laugh, feel included and to participate in activities together with their friends and family. We are relational beings at our core and emphasizing similarities helps children to relate to one another. The more we can relate to each other the more understanding, compassion and interest we can develop. This is true in any teaching context across all different ages. What is something that the children have in common? Are they both learning something new they could share with each other? Are they the same age? Go to the same school? Or like the same activities?
9. Learn about disabilities together. As children get older they are able to ask more complex questions and are hoping to get more complex responses. Take your youngsters questions as opportunities to learn about different disabilities together. What do you know about Down syndrome? Autism Spectrum Disorder? Cerebral Palsy? Sensory Processing Disorder? If your child asks about one of these and you don’t feel prepared to answer your child’s question in the moment you can always say, ‘I’m not sure. I will think about it and get back to you.’ or ‘I don’t’ know much about Cerebral Palsy, let’s learn more about it together.’
10. Facilitate conversation. No matter the age, social interaction with children and teens stems from having shared experiences together. In school settings taking classes together, participating in an after school club together or sports create these opportunities. Outside of school, children interact with each other in places like the playground. For some youngsters, making a friend on the playground is easy. For others, and many children with disabilities this is not as easy. Adults can help children with and without disabilities talk to each other, to help them find common ground, understand different forms of communication, slow down a conversation if children need more time to process or to help the youngsters really hear what the other said.” https://playworld.com/blog/the-importance-of-inclusive-playgrounds/#gref https://childrensplaygarden.org/10-strategies-for-talking-to-kids-about-disability/
Some Famous People with Disabilities (Health Conditions)
Perhaps Share these Incredible People with your Children
. Andrea Botticelli: blind, world famous singer
. Lexie Delaney: Collins Syndrome, Make a Wish Georgia ambassador, (bones in the face do not form like in Wonder By Palacio) Citylifestyle.com /EastCobb March 2024
. Peter Dinlage: little person, actor
. Whoopi Goldberg: dyslexia, actress
. Mahandas Karamchand Gandhi: glasses, employed nonviolent resistance that lead to the successful independence of India from British rule and inspired movements for civil rights and freedom across the world
. Stephen Hawking: ALS (motor neuron disease) scientist, physicist
. Frida Kahlo: artist, “known for her infamous, vibrant self-portraits, Mexican Painter Frida Kahlo was involved in a bus accident at just 18 years old. She had also had polio as a child. As an adult she had a leg amputated. The crash would leave her with a likely spinal cord injury, physical ailments and mobility issues for the rest of her life, making her a famous wheelchair user. Many of Frida’s works were inspired by the pain she experienced after the accident and into adulthood.” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frida_Kahlo
. Marlee Matlin: deaf, actress
. Elon Musk: alopecia, business magnate and investor, the founder, chairman, CEO and chief technology officer of SpaceX,
. Heather Noib: a prosthesis, athlete
. Lauren Potter: Down syndrome, actress
. Amy Purdy: “lost both legs, has won three back-to-back World Cup gold medals in snowboard cross, has become the top-ranked para-snowboarder in the U.S., and is a favorite to win a gold medal at the Sochi Paralympics. To top it all, Amy is also a model, actress, motivational speaker and licensed massage therapist.” https://www.pbs.org/wgbh/medal-quest/athletes/detail/amy-purdy/
. Franklin Roosevelt: polio, wheelchair, President 4 terms
. Rich Rotilla: leg length discrepancy, actor
. Nick Vujicic absence of 4 limbs, world-renowned motivational speaker.
. Bruce Willis: aphasia, actor
https://www.inspiringmomlife.com/famous-people-with-disabilities/
https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-1-d&q=famous+people+who+are+disabled
The following article thinks the following people may have been autistic: https://www.passionatepeople.invacare.eu.com/famous-disabled-people-inspire-day/:
. Albert Einstein: scientist
. Beethoven: composer
. Mozart: composer
. Hans Christian Anderson: author